Last Monday, Mrs Pamela asked us to choose two things to protest about.
The first thing I am against is absolutely going to war. We all know World War II, which was so cruel that over 73 million people died in the war. Resulting from the deaths, many living people suffered a lot from losing their dearest ones. On top of that, the development of many countries was slowed down because the fundamental facilities were hugely hit. What's more, the war also led to severe conflict between peoples. To make things worse, the unhappy feeling even exists among the decendants, taking the unharmonious relationship between China and Japan for example. Therefore, I strongly advocate a peaceful world forever.
The other thing I oppose is cuts in education. One crucial reason why USA is so powerful is that USA has the most advanced education system and invests much into education. Development of our modern society is actually based on progress in science and technology promoted by education. And education needs financial support from government. So the government should put in more money to better education.
I think the second paragraph needs to talk about the disadvantage about cuts in education in contrast with the advantage of investing more into education.Besides,the second picture does not suit the paragraph.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your observation, but I think the second picture is ok. I just want to attach a picture about education.
DeleteYour sentences are very flexible,but your supporting points canbe better I think.
ReplyDeleteThank you. I'll try to overcome my weakness next time.
DeleteIt is good to give the example of WWII,well done!
ReplyDeleteThank you very much!
DeleteThe examples and pictures are so good for explaining your ideas. Nice.
ReplyDeleteThank you very much!
DeleteI agree with you.There should be no more war.
ReplyDeleteWhen it comes to cuts in education,I think that you may provide more details about it.
Thank you for your valuable comment!
Delete